Finishing up the September Stories – Albuquerque

At the end of September, John and I went on a quick trip to Albuquerque. Less than two weeks later, I went back to Albuquerque again for a wedding. If I had known back when we booked the first trip that I would be turning around and going right back for a wedding, we might have skipped the first trip! But we went, and had a good time, and here’s that story.

One cool thing that came out of our trip to Albuquerque was that we were able to do a favor for our friends, Mark and Steve. (By coincidence, this couple have the same first names as my brothers. It makes it easy to remember their names, lol!) Mark and Steve have a wonderful guest casita on their property in the North Valley, where we stay almost every time we go to Albuquerque.

We were at our campsite in Utah when we unexpectedly got a call from Mark. The tone of his greeting sounded hesitant and reluctant, or apologetic. I couldn’t imagine why Mark would be apologetically calling us except to cancel our casita reservation, and I couldn’t imagine him doing that unless something was really wrong – maybe his husband, Steve, was sick? I was worried. “Is everything ok?”, I asked, “Are you ok? Is Steve ok?”

They were fine. Whew! Turns out that Mark was calling to ask a favor – hence the reluctant or apologetic tone in his voice.

The story went like this. Mark and Steve own a cabin in the Jemez Mountains north of Albuquerque. This is in addition to their nice house and casita in Albuquerque. Their “cabin” is actually a house with a detached garage, presumably quite nice, knowing them. They were doing some remodeling and had newly stained the wooden exterior of their Jemez Mt. house, intending to stain the nearby garage the same color. But the manufacturer discontinued that particular stain before they were done.

You would have to know Mark and Steve to understand what a catastrophe that was. They are very particular and they would not be happy with a garage a slightly different shade than the house, even though they are two separate buildings. They would have to redo the entire house if they couldn’t manage to buy up enough of the original stain to finish the garage.

Mark was trying to explain the story about the stain, but I had a very poor cell connection at our campsite out in the middle of Utah. (We would have had no connection at all except for our Starlink, which boosts the connection quite a lot). Mark was saying “stain” but I could not parse what in the world he was saying. I was still surmising health issues. Finally he said, “Like paint, you know…” Oh! We are talking about a remodel issue! Now we were in familiar territory.

Of course John and I, who have done several remodels, totally understood their predicament. When they found out their stain was discontinued, they had quickly bought all the discontinued stain they could find in New Mexico and online (exactly what I’ve done myself, except in my case, for a specific color of grout).

After exhausting the New Mexico supply of discontinued stain they still needed 4 more gallons. Determined, they called every hardware and construction supply store in the region and finally found the remaining 4 gallons at an obscure hardware store in a suburb of Phoenix. They immediately bought it over the phone with a credit card, and the store agreed to hold it for them for one month.

But now, how were they going to get the stain to Albuquerque? Stain is considered a hazardous material so it’s not easy to ship. Someone would have to go get it. It was a long shot, but Mark decided to call us, even though Tucson is a full two hours drive from Phoenix.

We could have driven up to Phoenix for them, but as it turns out, we were camping in Utah and planning to drive back home through Phoenix the very next day! And we had a trip to Albuquerque scheduled for the next week! It wouldn’t even be out of our way. So that was the silver lining to our rather difficult camping trip in Utah. We were able to pick up Mark and Steve’s stain along the way home, and deliver it to them the very next week.

Our trip to Albuquerque also had another practical purpose: we were able to pick up a piece of furniture we had ordered. We are slowly over the years collecting furniture from Antigua Home Furnishings in Taos. https://antiguahomefurnishings.com/

I’ve probably mentioned them before. I get excited every time we get a new piece! We started buying their pieces quite some years ago, when we still lived in Albuquerque. We’ve been their customers so long that we’ve become friends. They’re up in Taos, but they frequently deliver to Albuquerque. So we arranged to meet them in Albuquerque to pick up our new cabinet when we were out there.

Here they are, unloading our latest piece. It’s a big cabinet but I had measured our 4Runner ahead of time and knew it would fit inside. You can see Mark and Steve’s casita behind the adobe wall.

By the way, here is a photo of the entry to Mark and Steve’s house. The interior is really beautiful too, with the walls full of Steve’s art, as well as many other local artist’s work.

We weren’t in Albuquerque just to collect and deliver goods however. There is a music event called Globalquerque that we like to attend at the end of every September. I’ve written about it before. It’s free and fun, and runs for two evenings, and is one of the many things that makes Albuquerque special.

And that leads me to another funny story.

On the first night of Globalquerque, John saw an old friend he has known for many years. Apparently Tom was once a close coworker of John’s, but they haven’t worked together for many years, so I had never met him and his wife Myra. When John pointed them out to me from a distance, I marched right over there to introduce myself, with John trotting along behind.

They seemed nice and we chatted and hung out most of the evening. Afterwards, on our drive back to the casita, John explained that Tom was not just a previous coworker – he was the brother of John’s ex-fiancée, Jane.

John had never been married before he married me, but he did have a fiancée when he was in his twenties. Jane was Tom’s sister, and that’s how John had met her – through Tom.

I had heard the story before. Apparently, it was a long distance relationship that fell apart when Jane was reluctant to move to Albuquerque and John was reluctant to find a different job elsewhere. Sounds like there were some communication difficulties too. In relationships, there always are.

Anyway, on the evening that we ran into Tom and Myra, I didn’t know they were Jane’s relatives. I only knew they were old friends of John’s. And no one mentioned Jane. Myra later told me that she spent the whole evening wondering if I knew about Jane, but not saying anything. Lol. So yes, I knew about Jane, but no, I didn’t realize that Tom was Jane’s brother.

It wouldn’t have mattered to me either way. Jane was a long time before me. There was no overlap; John did not leave her for me, nor did I ever worry that he would go back to her, nothing like that. She’s always just been a name from his past.

We ran into Tom and Myra again the next night and that time, I knew who they were. I asked about Jane and was glad to hear that she is well. She has a long-term partner, is still living in the same region up north, and has recently retired from the same job she had way back 3 decades ago when she was engaged to John. So yes, apparently not a woman who likes a lot of changes in her life. Uh, let’s not talk about how many job changes I’ve made and how many times I’ve moved in 3 decades!

It was nice to hear that Jane’s story turned out fine. I like to imagine that John’s did too (lol, right John?) And I was reminded how old we all are. We go through life making decisions that seem momentous, so significant at the time, decisions that completely alter the trajectory of our lives. But in the end, nothing stops the passage of time.

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Utah Camping Trip in September

John wasn’t so enthused about yesterday’s post. He called it a “smorgasbord” which I guess is polite for “rambling”. And he said it didn’t have any amazing pictures. I beg to differ. Pictures of my friends aren’t amazing? Pictures of me in a dorky striped blue hat and purple gardening clothes holding a large metal star isn’t amazing? Pictures of high-end turquoise mountain bikes on the back of a Sprinter van isn’t amazing? I mean, yes, it would have been more amazing if they were our bikes and our Sprinter van and not just something I saw in the botanical garden parking lot.

Here is what John means by amazing:

Unfortunately, our September Utah camping trip was mostly not fun. But we got some great pictures! I could just post the rest of the beautiful pictures and wax poetic about the wonders of nature, or I could tell you what really went down.

Let’s just say…every pet in our life was sick that weekend! Laura was texting from vacation in Peru saying that their cat, Caden, was in the hospital in California and might have to be put down. Luckily, Alex’s mom was pet sitting for them and was able to get the cat to the veterinary ER. Meanwhile, Callan and Guen were calling saying their dog Blue was in the hospital and might have to be put down. This was sudden and unexpected for both animals.

Meanwhile, our own dog, Biska had a bad case of diarrhea and John spent all night getting up with her because she kept needing to be let out of the camper van. It’s not really safe for her to be out alone at night in the wilderness, so John would have to pull on clothes and boots and leash her up and go out there in the cold, every couple of hours. I don’t think anyone slept for two nights. (Yes, it was John going out there with her, not me, because he’s amazing like that.)

We also had a totally traumatizing unexpected encounter with horses, which I can barely even think about, except to say that we’re ok. But I’m still upset about it.

Then the weather forecast changed, as a front approached. And we were worried about Biska’s health, even though she was running around with her usual energy, she wasn’t eating much and continued to have the stomach bug. So we gave up and went home. But we did somehow manage to get a ton of good pictures. So yeah, I could have told a much more cheerful story, but my truth is what you’re getting.

Here’s the rest of the amazing pictures:

Yep, beautiful photos but not exactly a relaxing trip. So fast forward to now…how did it all turn out?

Unfortunately Callan and Guen’s dog, Blue, did need to be put down, although not for another few weeks. Blue was an older dog, who used to live with Guen and her previous partner. Blue only recently started living with Callan and Guen. Understandably, Guen was quite upset to lose her dog, and Callan was too, even though they didn’t have the dog very long.

Laura’s cat, Caden, recovered to some extent, but continues to have some long term health issues.

Biska was fine as soon as we got home, thank goodness.

We’ll go back to Utah again next year. Hopefully with a more cheerful story to go along with the inevitably amazing photos.

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Rodrigo Y Gabriela

I really enjoyed the Gloria Trevi concert, but I still wasn’t done. It gets better! The next Friday I dragged John all the way up to Phoenix to see an amazing guitar duo, Rodrigo Y Gabriela. Luckily John really liked the show.

After our excellent experiment staying onsite at the casino the previous week, there was no way I was going to drive all the way back down to Tucson late at night from Phoenix. I was able to find a room at a hotel immediately across the street from the theater. We could look out our window and see if there was a line at the door!

But first we walked a block or so to get dinner.

When we first arrived at the hotel, we parked the car in a 10 minute zone while John went into the hotel lobby to inquire about parking. Within just a couple of minutes, a doorman gave me a hard time for being there, even though we were parked approximately 3 minutes and I had never even left the car. However, this purple Lamborghini parked in the 10 minute zone for the entire evening. You can do anything when you own a purple Lamborghini with green wheels and no license plate.

There were driverless cars practicing in the streets.

The concert was excellent! One of the best I’ve ever been to. Rodrigo Y Gabriela are extremely talented guitarists.

I didn’t take very many photos because I was too busy listening to the music.

This movie will give you an idea of how fast their fingers move! But the sound quality is poor.

Here’s a link to their youtube channel, https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC2aEvw7VlapqdI6TB6AMjNQ

They’re done touring for now, but I’m hoping they do another one soon with another stop near us. They’re the best, and I’d listen to them every week if I could!

Here we are, walking across the street to our hotel after the show.

What a great night!

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Gloria Trevi

The next Friday I dragged John out to the casino amphitheater to see Gloria Trevi perform. If you haven’t heard of her, she has sometimes been called the “The Supreme Diva of Mexican Pop” and the “Madonna of Mexico”. She is my age but doesn’t look like it (at least not from a distance). In addition to being an excellent singer, she puts on a very fancy, sexy, glamorous show with lots of dancers.

I had gotten a hotel room onsite at the casino so we wouldn’t have to drive home at midnight. Have you ever stayed in a hotel in your own town? It’s such an extravagance and hard to justify! Usually the only reason people do that is if there’s something very wrong with their house – a flood, fire or major remodel. Not just for fun!

But this time it was for fun and convenience. I get quite stressed in the press of traffic after an event, particularly in the dark with thousands of pedestrians trying to find their cars. And the casino is on the far side of town, quite far from our house. I was also thinking that if John hated the show, he could just go up to our room and wait for me there.

The previous time we had gone to this venue John was miserable, so it wasn’t an unlikely possibility. The problem the first time was that I had unknowingly bought tickets right in front of a big speaker, so it was far too loud and the sound was muddy. We had similar tickets this time (because I had bought both shows around the same time, months ahead of time, before we went to the first show, so I didn’t know any better). Since our tickets were so close to the front, I was worried he would be miserable again.

We went early to enjoy the casino before the show. We aren’t gamblers, but we do like a nice resort. At first we thought we’d get dinner at one of the several restaurants, but it turns out they were all indoors.

It doesn’t look like indoors, does it? The domed ceiling is very cleverly painted and lit to look like evening. But there’s one big glitch in the mirage. When we first walked into this space we could instantly tell we hadn’t gone outdoors because it was cold! This was the first week of September and outdoor temperatures were over 100º. We weren’t fooled for even a second. The air conditioning was so cold, and the slot machines were so loud, that we didn’t want to eat there.

After inquiring, we were told we could get sandwiches poolside. The advantage of 100º heat is we had the pool to ourselves.

I have no idea why no one was enjoying this beautiful pool. They were all in the noice and din, gambling. Somehow that’s more fun?

There was plenty of full shade thanks to the hotel tower, and there was a nice breeze, so we weren’t too hot.

Plus, bonus, we could hear the band warming up. We joked that John should just stay and listen to the the band from poolside. They weren’t too loud from way out here!

We happily ate our sandwiches until eventually the hungry yellow jackets drove us back inside to our room. We had a great view of the desert from our room. It felt like such a spurge to get a hotel room in our own town. But it really made the event feel like a vacation.

Here’s a few pictures from the show. The problem with concerts is that they aren’t all that photogenic, unlike, for example, our camping trips. Our camping trips are usually beautiful, even when they are completely miserable. It always looks like we had a great time, regardless of reality. But concert pictures don’t tell the whole story because there’s no sound (which is the main point of a concert). You can’t tell if the band was any good, but you can tell we had great seats.

All glammed up with early 80’s hair. I remember how we all ran that single curl down each side of our face.

Gloria Trevi had talented backup musicians and dancers. I particularly liked this male dancer in drag. I think I took as many photos of him as I did of Gloria, lol.

It was a fun night, with a happy crowd. And I’m pleased to report that John liked the show too! When it was over, we walked up to our room and watched the crazy traffic out our window. Now that’s the way to watch a show!

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Life Coaching for Neurodiverse Professionals

Four Nights of Music in a Row

After the disappointing flamenco music at the Hacienda the previous night (August 30), John and I went to my favorite venue, Monterey Court the next night (August 31). Monterey Court offers outdoor patio live music and dancing, and their food is good too. The only problem with Monterey Court is that it’s across town. The band that night was good, a local blues band called Javelina Blu.

On Sunday night, September 1st, I went to hear another local band called the Coolers, playing at St Philips plaza. I think I’ve mentioned that I run a small Meet-up group. We just meet for local music and dancing. On that night, only one of my Meet-up friends was able to make it, but we had a nice time. John doesn’t go to my Meet-up functions – I keep him busy enough taking me to other events!

Then on Monday night September 2nd, I met my friend Amy downtown and we heard a very good band, Johnny Rawls and Bad News Blues. Amy lives within walking distance of downtown, so I drove to her house and we walked from there.

Screenshot

After four nights straight of going out, immediately after my trip to California, I started wondering if I was partying a bit too hard for an old lady. But I wasn’t done! After a three day break, I was right back at it the next Friday night. More on that soon.

To send me a comment, email turning51bykristina@gmail.com.

Life Coaching for Neurodiverse Professionals

To send me a comment, email turning51bykristina@gmail.com.

Life Coaching for Neurodiverse Professionals

Over Scheduled

I’ve been doing some good stuff this month – none of which I’ve blogged about because I’ve been having too much fun AND I’ve been stressed AND I never finished blogging about my California trip last month! It seems like so long ago now. I have several more California drafts started, so maybe I can plow through those and then get a start on September – before it’s October. I need to stop doing fun stuff until I have time to catch up!

I got overly stressed out for a week or two recently, so now I’m in middle of the difficult task of trying to figure out what to cut out. It’s all about balance! Travel in particular is stressful for me. I like being places. I just find it very nerve wracking getting there and back. In addition to my California trip, John and I have been doing road trips every weekend. Plus social events, which is great because we are trying to make local friends.

Getting the social balance finely tuned is a challenge. Ideally I like to hang out with one or two other people at a time. But I find that the best way to make friends is to join groups. Therefore, I’m currently attending several group events, and I even run one myself. I started a Meet-up group and I schedule local live music events, ideally with dancing.

My purpose for starting the Meet-up group is to meet other women to go dancing with, because John doesn’t like to dancing (the freestyle kind of dancing I do doesn’t require partners, luckily). So all I need is a friend or small group of friends to go with. I don’t actually like running the Meet-up group. It’s a big pain the butt, frankly. My plan is to give it a year, with the goal of having some dancing friends at the end of the year. I started the group in March or April, so I am going to keep at it going through the winter. Let’s see if I come out of this experiment with some friends to go dancing with!

Between all the things I’ve been trying, I’ve been going to too many events lately. As soon as I got back from California, I went out every night for 4 nights straight. That’s too much! Also several things have come up recently that I hadn’t counted on. Because life is like that!

I really just want to do it all! Huh, funny, but I can’t. It’s like sticking to a budget but with fuzzier data. With a financial budget you can at least see how much you have, so the only guesswork is related to unexpected expenses. Personal energy budgets are harder. Not only are there unexpected energy sinks, you don’t know how much you’re starting with. Imagine trying to stick to your financial budget when random days you have more money in your checking account than other days. The only way to handle that much uncertainty in my personal energy budget (if occasional crashing isn’t an option) is to leave a large cushion. That means limiting myself to less every day than I could actually happily do on most days. Well, darn!

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Life Coaching for Neurodiverse Professionals