Ann moved to Dallas! Ann was our sweet tenant with a lovable and enormous golden doodle. She got a much better job offer in Dallas and just couldn’t resist. Plus, she was ready for a new scene.
We were faced with the question – do we sell or rent the house? And if we rent it, should we list it with a rental management company, or continue to manage it ourselves?
It seems silly to try to manage an Albuquerque rental from Tucson, but the last time we had a management company for a rental in Albuquerque when we were living in California, it seemed like dealing with the rental management company was just as much of a nuisance as dealing with tenants. If not more! They were charging us for the privilege of being a nuisance!
So off I went to Albuquerque to replace our tenant myself. John had to work in Albuquerque that week anyway, so the timing worked out.
Typically I’d get a rental completely ready before advertising it – professional cleaners, carpets professionally shampooed, yard cleanup by a landscaping crew, and a thorough handyman fix-all. There are always things broken – sink stoppers that don’t operate, a stove burner that doesn’t light, nail holes in walls, blinds that are loose or inoperable, stuck locks, drippy sink traps, grinding garage doors, dirty filters, etc.
This house had all the typical things needing fixed and I lined up the workers for the first few days of the week. Initially I figured it would take a week to get the house in shape, and another week to get it shown and a lease signed. But the market is very strong and I was in a rush to get back to Tucson. I decided to go ahead and advertise and show the house at the same time as all the cleaning and repairs were being done, and see if I could get it all done in under a week.
I felt apologetic while showing a dirty house with cleaning supplies and handyman tools and paint buckets strewn everywhere. I kept reassuring people not to worry, that it would all be done in a couple of days. But all the prospective tenants were like, “We don’t care, it doesn’t matter, please, please rent to us, please, please we want this house, tell use when we can sign, we can pay starting today, please, please, please.”
Typically that amount of strong interest (dozens of applicants) would suggest I priced the rent way too low. But I had marked it up by 25% and I just didn’t feel right about going any higher. I listed it at maybe slightly below market rate, but not that much lower. It’s a pretty little house, with a nice back patio in a very good school district. But it’s small. The problem is not my pricing – the problem is a shortage of housing.
Even though I know I’m lucky that it rented easily, it was a stressful experience for me. I don’t like turning people down, I don’t like disappointing people, I don’t like saying no. I felt bad for them all. I’ve been there myself when I was a single mom – trying desperately to find a house to rent in a tight market. I was nearly in tears when the applications started pouring in moments after the ad went live and I realized how bad the market was. And I was crying again as I sent “sorry” messages to everyone. I’ve been managing rentals for many years now, but for some reason I really took it hard this time.
It’s done now. The very first applicant (who contacted me literally seconds after the ad appeared) turned out to be highly qualified (I go by credit score). So I rented it to her. It’s weird – she reminds me so much of my previous tenant. It’s just coincidence, but they are similar-looking young women, both with a golden doodle. The neighbors are going to be like, “They only rent to single young women with golden doodles?”
I know you’re thinking that with so many applicants I could have said “no pets.” And that’s true, but it’s a house with a little yard and it’s so hard to find rentals that allow pets. And I think that pets are important – sometimes a dog’s love is all we have to keep us away from the brink of despair in the hard times. I want to allow pets; they are important for our mental health.
We’re working on socializing Biska. We want her to grow up knowing how to interact with other dogs.
Luckily we have a nice dog park right near by us with separate sections for big and little dogs. On our first visit to the dog park, there were no dogs in the section for small dogs when we first arrived. Biska was excited to see all the dogs in the big dog section, and wanted to play with them. We tentatively gave it a try. She seemed a bit overwhelmed after we got in. There were too many big dogs and they were very interested in the new girl in town! When they crowded around her, she headed for the gate. Let me outta here!
Just when we were about to leave, Yoda arrived at the small dog section. Have you ever seen such an aptly named dog?
We quickly joined Yoda in the small dog area. Yay, saved by Yoda! I thought Yoda was great. He was very patient with Biska’s puppy energy. I’m hoping we get to see Yoda again.
Soon afterwards, Songbird arrived. She and Biska loved to run together.
Unfortunately Songbird’s human wanted to rant to me about politics. Uh – no thanks. I’m just here to let my dog play.
On another day we took Biska out to a doggie daycare and boarding place in the hills east of us. Unlike a dog park, this isn’t free! But Tally, the owner, is very good with the dogs and doesn’t accept problem dogs. Biska is safe there with friendly dogs and good supervision. We want to get her comfortable playing there so if we ever need to board her it won’t be traumatic for her.
We’re still going to Albuquerque regularly. John was out there this week but I didn’t go on this trip. I go on about half of his trips out there. I went on the previous trip at the end of January, and I’ll be going out on our next trip in mid-March. Here’s some photos from our trip at the end of January.
I went to my friend Tara’s house to see her new kittens (and Tara too of course!).
The black and white ones are Roxy and Ronnie. They are siblings.
Haha, that’s Pippa photo bombing. She’s the youngest and most energetic of the three. It was hard to catch her sitting still long enough to get a picture.
I also just had to take a picture of Tara’s dining room chair. Her chairs are the coolest! I loved them. There’s no way John would agree to such modern furniture if I wanted something like that though!
I hadn’t seen Tara’s furniture before because it had been in storage in California while she rented an apartment in Albuquerque and looked for a house. I’m so glad she finally found a house. The housing market is so difficult everywhere right now.
Here’s Tara playing her harp.
Another day we managed to get out for a hike in the snow. This is outside Placitas where we used to hike a lot when we lived up there.
I also went on a hike with my friend Anjie in the foothills within walking distance from my house.
I guess I should have taken a selfie of the two of us together. I forget to do that and just take pictures of my friends. It’s my age showing – you know, back in the day we didn’t do selfies! So I don’t think of it.
People ask me if I miss the snow now that we’ve moved to Tucson. I can’t imagine missing snow. I don’t like snow – except it is briefly beautiful when it first falls. I guess I won’t truly know if I miss it until I’ve spent a few winters without it. I’m still getting plenty enough regular snow in my life with all our trips to Albuquerque.
Of course if there were no snow, there would be no cute pictures of puppies with snow on their nose!
CLEAN SCANS! NED! (No Evidence of Disease.) Whoo-hoo! I didn’t know how much I was worried until I got my results. “No evidence of recurrent or metastatic disease within the chest, abdomen, or pelvis.“
I had been previously scanning every three months, and this time I went six. And I was dubious. It was a long time not to know what might be growing inside me. Every little twinge and pull and funny little pain…
John and I are planning a house remodel and planning trips for next year and in the back of my mind, I’m wondering…next year? That’s a long time from now. Anything can happen. Cancer, pandemic…we don’t know what next year will bring.
It’ll be several years yet before I’m completely out of the woods and by that time, as my good friend reminded me, I’ll “be old anyway”. LOL!
The report does mention “mild spondylitic changes involving the imaged spine.” That’s been noted before, and I believe it means arthritis. Fine, whatever. As long as it’s not cancer.
My scan was done just after noon today and my results posted in my patient portal less than 5 hours later. I could hardly believe it. Usually it takes several days. When I got an email message saying that there was a new message in my portal I figured it was some administrative glitch, like my visa rejected the charge (I haven’t hit my deductible yet this year, so it was out-of-pocket today).
I did not expect results this fast! I was almost suspicious – like did the radiologist actually look at my scans? I did notice that the cancer center was practically empty this morning, and I wizzed through the blood draw and IV and scan and everything in record time. Maybe they’re just finally not backlogged anymore. My whole cancer journey has completely coincided with the pandemic, so who knows what normal looks like.
Thanks to all of you who are providing feedback from my last blog as I try to figure out how to make the videos work.
My brother Steven wrote to suggest that I also post simple links to the videos in addition to the embedded version, since the embedded videos aren’t making it through. I wrote back explaining that was exactly what I’ve been trying to do, but wordpress (my blog software) embeds them automatically. That’s why I posted each in two different ways – I was trying to post the link without it being imbedded.
As I was explaining to Steven that was what I’ve been trying to do but failing, I thought of another way to try. So let’s do another test!
We’re going to experiment with a link to a video of Steven playing my handpan at Christmas time. I was very impressed with his musical ability. He had never even seen a handpan before in his life and just sat down and started playing it.
First I upload the video to youtube and copy the “shareable link”.
Then I paste that “shareable link” into my blog post.
Here’s what happens when I paste in the youtube link using a normal paste function: It embeds it automatically.
Do any of you see a video or a link to a video above this sentence? I think you’re getting exactly nothing, although I see the video.
Here’s a screenshot of what I’m seeing on my end:
Somehow I need to paste that link into my blog without wordpress automatically embedding the video. How do I make it stay just a link?
Steven gave me an idea by suggesting that I include a clickable link above or below the embedded video. And I have definitely tried, but I couldn’t figure out how. Every time I tried to paste a clickable link of a video into my blog, it would automatically change from a link to an embedded video. Non-video links work just fine – they stay as links – when I paste them into my blog. It’s just the video links that are automatically being converted to an embedded video when I paste them.
But then I remembered a link function I use to link to other parts of my blog. It looks like this:
And it works like this – I put in my keyword and it brings up relevant links from my blog.
I usually use that link function as a search engine to search for the url of the post I want to link to. But maybe if I pasted the video link into that link box, rather than into a regular paragraph block, it would link to the video instead of embed the video?
It was a “oh duh” lightbulb moment for me. I didn’t realize the link function worked for links outside my blog (such as youtube), because the search results are always limited to my blog posts, not the whole internet. Can you imagine what it would return if it were searching the whole internet using the keyword, “video”? LOL.
Because the keyword results are limited to my own blog, it didn’t occur to me that I could put outside internet links in there, like a youtube link. I thought that function was just an internal function, limited to within the blog.
But what happens if I paste the youtube video link into the box where I usually put a search term?
It looks like it’s going to work! Here’s the test – this link should take you away from this blog post and to the video on youtube. It’s not embedded in my blog anymore, and it should be a working link. Click here: https://youtu.be/a3F5aRTOt8g
Did it work? I’m hoping so. Meanwhile I’m curious if this link works too, https://youtu.be/a3F5aRTOt8g – or maybe not. I think that didn’t render as a link. Which is fine. I’m pretty sure the one in the previous paragraph is going to work. We’ll find out in a moment!
I appreciate all the feedback – thanks for being my blog testers!!!
A little while ago I discovered that many people can’t play the videos in my posts. I don’t know why not, but I’d like to fix the issue. Here’s a couple of test videos, uploaded it slightly differently.
Can you play the first one, the second one, or neither one of them?
Video #1: Puppy in the rain (public, embedded)
Video #2: Puppy in the rain (public, youtube)
Here’s another video, this one with the settings somewhat different.
Video #3: Playing ball at sunset (unlisted, embedded)
Video #4: Playing ball at sunset (unlisted, youtube)
If you are able to play these videos and have the sound on and listen very closely you might be able to hear the coyotes in the background (plus some local domestic dogs joining in). Biska was oblivious, content to simply chase her ball. Until it went into the pool, lol.
Thanks for being my test audience! If you get my posts in your email, and can’t see any of the videos, you should be able to see them directly on my website, https://turning51.com/
When I was searching online for a puppy last summer, I was looking for a poodle because poodles don’t shed. Rescued poodle mixes sometimes shed, depending on which fur genes they inherit. When I first saw Biska I suspected she would shed because she had a straight coat rather than a curly coat. But I was hoping her poodle genes would count for something. Plus, she was so darn cute!
Her fur did actually have a slight kink to it, which was a hopeful sign. I knew it was just her puppy coat and her adult coat would grow in differently. It remained to be seen whether she would turn out to be a big shedder, a light shedder, or a non-shedder. I didn’t think she was curly enough to be a non-shedder, so I’ve been hoping for a low-shedder. Generally a poodle mix would at least shed less than a regularly shedding dog.
For a long time it seemed like she didn’t shed much. Until 2 weeks ago. Suddenly there’s dog hair everywhere! EVERYWHERE! So the million dollar question is: Is she just losing her puppy coat? Now is the age to do it. Her puppy coat should be falling out and she should be growing her adult fur – and then we will see whether her adult fur will be shedding or not.
It’s possible she’s already grown in her adult fur, in which case is this could be spring shedding. Is it going to be like this every spring? Or is this her new normal and she’s going to be like this year-round?! Heaven forbid. Whatever’s going on I hope it’s not like this continually forever. I love this dog, but her mom’s a poodle and I was hoping for some low-shedding!
She is growing up to be super cute, but not looking very much like a poodle!
The only place she has poodle fur is two tufts behind her ears!
Regardless of whether this is just her puppy coat coming out or annual spring shedding, I’m hoping for some improvement soon. Just tell me this is not the year-round new normal!
Meanwhile, it’s allergy season! I don’t know why people think the desert is a good place to go to alleviate allergies. It’s true there’s less mold and mildew here than in most parts of the country. But there’s not less pollen.
This is a tree in my backyard. I think it’s native. It’s some sort of desert willow.
Yep, that’s pollen you see coating the ground in yellow.
Between dog fur and pollen, now is not the best time to visit me in Tucson if you’re prone to hay fever! The weather, however, has been fantastic.
We were in Albuquerque a couple of weeks ago. It was so cold!
One morning we went to the Biopark and discovered this beautiful icy landscape in the Japanese garden. They had apparently left the sprinklers on overnight! It was just in this one section. We assumed it was a mistake or a broken control. It must have been somewhat difficult to fix, because the sprinklers were still going when we got there mid-morning. It was very beautiful. In a major oops sort of way.
Going back and forth between Albuquerque and Tucson in the middle of the winter is very confusing for the part of my brain that tracks what season it is! Particularly when below-freezing sprinkler action is added to the mix. Meanwhile, it’s 75 degrees in Tucson and I have a new Meyer lemon tree!
It’s like I have two lives. I’ll wake up some mornings, not knowing where I am, and I’ll be like, which life am I in today?
You know how, every once in awhile, you come across a book that you are so completely convinced that everyone in your life needs to read, that everyone gets the book for Christmas?
Except it’s February. And most of my family’s birthdays are in January (due to poor planning, I guess). Neither Christmas nor birthdays are going to come around anytime soon. I guess I’ll just have to send my family copies of the book now. And then in December I can send Christmas cards that say, “You know that book I sent you in February that you still haven’t read yet? Well, read it now, and Merry Christmas!” It will all work out perfectly. Lol. I’m joking! I won’t really do that. Or not exactly.
The book is Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End, by Atul Gawande. It was written back in 2014 so it’s currently free on Kindle Unlimited if you subscribe to that, otherwise it’s available used. Unless I send it to you. In that case it’s available free on your front porch in an Amazon box.
I recommend it for anyone who is not so young anymore, or who has aging parents. Much of the book would also be useful for anyone has a family member who is, due to cancer or other illness, reasonably likely to have a period of time where a lot of physical care is needed.
The author starts out by talking about the process of aging and how lots of things just start slowly wearing down and falling apart. It’s often not just one serious thing that kills us. It’s a complicated intermix of things. He offers some very practical advice regarding paying attention to things like balance and core strength, and foot and ankle health, because rounds of hospitalizations often start with trips and falls.
He talks about how doctors really aren’t trained for elderly care – they are trained to cure acute illnesses. And how our system isn’t ideal for long term care. This is not news, but he does a good job of discussing the various alternatives that we do have.
He talks about the different types of living situations available for people who are starting to struggle to live on their own. He gives the history of how that has changed in our country over the past few decades, and why. He explains the large differences between nursing homes vs. other more independent options, and what attributes make a big difference for the inhabitants to truly feel “at home”. Turns out it’s not as simple as I thought.
Turns out the key that helps people feel at home isn’t necessarily having their own place. The key is being able to do what they want when they want, and to make their own decisions – even when their decisions are bad ones. That’s part of being an adult – eating those donuts when we know we shouldn’t!
He also explains how grown children of the elderly are motivated to keep their parents safe – when safety isn’t necessarily as big of a priority for the elderly. It really helped me see the situation more from the elderly’s point of view, and not just from the point of view of the elderly parent’s grown children.
Then he switches away from logistics and living situations and talks for some time about making medical decisions. I used to naively think that when you got sick, the doctor had a treatment plan and that’s what you did.
I have since discovered on my cancer journey that there is never just one clear treatment and never one clear choice. It’s not always clear when one should have chemotherapy. And even if it is fairly clearly called for, there are dozens of different kinds of chemo and dozens of combinations of chemo for varying lengths of time.
It’s a maze of choices and doctors can’t always know what is best for each patient. Some doctors make most of the choices themselves and tell their patients what their “best” option is. When I was pregnant with Laura and they decided to induce labor early, I was not given any options or any way to be part of the decision-making. In hindsight I now know enough to realize that there were other options and there was plenty of time to have that discussion. It was a serious situation but not an emergency situation.
Other doctors offer lists and lists of choices and pros and cons and leave it up to the bewildered patient. The best doctors listen to their patients to understand the patient’s goals and values and then give relevant information and guidance, based on that specific person’s goals and values. Surgeons and oncologists as life coaches.
In my opinion, this section of the book was the most valuable at all. It explains how to have those important conversations with the doctors – what to ask and what about your preferences they need to understand. I can’t understate how difficult it is to decide what to do when suddenly faced with multiple treatment options, especially when your life is on the line.
It gets especially complicated when people are close to dying. We go to the hospital to be cured, but at some point, especially for the elderly and in cases like advanced cancer, there becomes a time when – there just isn’t a cure. At that point you will probably want to shift away from trying to cure the disease to trying to live the best you can in the short time you have left. These are very different goals and can result in a complete U-turn in your decision-making. And of course the patient and their family members aren’t all making that U-turn in unison. Because how do you know when you are at that point?
The final section of the book talked about what it’s like to be in hospice. This was very sad and I cried some, but it was also fascinating. I’ve never seen someone die. And yet, we will all die and we also will lose our parents and our spouses (if we don’t die first ourselves). I’m glad I now know much more about it than I did. It’s not a fun topic, but I feel at least a tiny bit more prepared. And I’m grateful for that.
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