Category: June 2019

The local newspaper delivery service has been mistakingly delivering a daily paper to our house. I called to explain the error, but the paper is still arriving. So I’ve been taking a look at it, because hey, we have it, but it’s been very discouraging. And I don’t mean the national news (we all know how terrifying that is). I mean the local news.

Every day there’s stories about women and children being murdered in various kinds of domestic disputes and abuse. Today’s headline was about a sex trafficking operation within 5 miles from my house.

One one hand, I feel like I shouldn’t be ignorant of this. On the other hand, I can’t hardly stand reading about it. Maybe once I’m settled I can think of some way to help the community a little. This state struggles in so many ways.

Meanwhile, the latest headline – 27% fewer cars stolen than the year before! But Albuquerque is still “the number one hot spot for stolen vehicles per capita in the country.” Good to be number 1 in something. Stolen cars isn’t as tragic as the domestic abuse and trafficking, but it all adds up to a bleak picture.

Speaking of cars, here is a somewhat more lighthearted image of the crazy life in New Mexico. I took this photo of a car stalled in the left hand turn lane at a large intersection. Before abandoning their stalled car right in the middle of the road, they took the time to put up their front windshield sunshade. It is summer in the desert after all. And you wouldn’t want an uncomfortably hot abandoned car blocking the intersection now would you?

These are great! https://themonsterproject.org/monstergalleryun/

I don’t usually repost if I don’t have anything much to say about it, but I thought you’d like these monsters. John found them.

The project had children draw monsters and then had professional artists use their ideas and elaborate on them.

The site took awhile to load with my lousy internet, but it was worth the wait. I just went and did something else, forgot about it, came back and…hey cool! Monster art! It actually loaded better on my phone.

I finally got most of them to load on my computer, here’s screenshots of several of my favorites. (credit, https://themonsterproject.org/monstergalleryun/)

This next one totally looks like someone I used to know. She was prettier though, lol.

I wish I could get all of them as screen savers!

Interacting with people I don’t know is challenging for me. I push myself to do it because strangers can become clients, or tenants, or employers or employees, or best of all – good friends.

So as far as potential goes, today was stellar! But now I’m tired.

It all started this morning, with a soft knock at the door. I rarely answer the door when I don’t know who it is, but I thought it was Calob, who is working for me doing some house repair and upgrades. So I quickly stuck the dogs in another room and opened the door. I was surprised to find a woman about my age. She introduced herself as one of my new neighbors out for her morning walk. Excellent! I invited her in and we chatted briefly and exchanged contact information and she went on her way.

Half an hour later I was second guessing myself and thinking I hadn’t been nice enough or welcoming enough (because I’m introverted, and also awkward, and also had been caught by surprise). So I texted her and said that I’d enjoy walking with her some morning. But she didn’t reply, so now I’m second guessing myself again.

Then at 11:00 I was scheduled to meet my new Little Sister from the Big Brothers Big Sister’s program. I got to meet her, and her grandma and her little brother. Her grandmother, Tammy, told me proudly that she and Larrisa’s half brother are 100% Navajo, and Larrisa (that’s how she spells it) is 3/4 Navajo and 1/4 Mexican.

Larrisa told me she is 10 years old and going into 5th grade because she started school a year late and NEVER FLUNKED ANYTHING! She was very clear about that. Larrisa is a little bit big for her age, so I hope she doesn’t get teased or looked down on at school for being bigger than the other little girls, and being a year older probably isn’t helping.

I really liked her right away – Larrisa is a happy, outgoing 10-year-old. I really liked her grandma, Tammy, also. Tammy is quiet and thoughtful. When we were on the elevator together Tammy confided that she wasn’t comfortable in elevators, and I told her I didn’t like flying. And Tammy said once when she visited California she spent the whole time worrying that there would be an earthquake. And it’s true, I did notice when I moved back to New Mexico, that when the wind hit the house and made it creak suddenly, I felt a brief flash of relief as I realized I wasn’t in California anymore. Just wind here, not earthquakes. I never thought I was bothered by earthquakes, but they’re just one more subtle thing that adds to the complexity of living in California. Larrisa doesn’t appear to be afraid of anything, and I hope she stays that way.

I also met her little 5-year-old half brother. For a second I thought he was a little girl, because in their culture little boys wear their hair long. Funny how we use these arbitrary things to signal gender. Luckily I hadn’t said anything before they introduced me to him. I didn’t fully understand his name, which was an unfamiliar name to me, and now I don’t remember it. But Larrisa can teach me later. Her little brother has a speech impediment, and they told me he might have autism. I told them my grown-up son has the same thing.

The meeting facilitator had a variety of ice breaker games for us, like having to draw each other’s faces without looking down at our sheet of paper, so we couldn’t see what we were doing. We didn’t like that one!

We also wrote down each other’s names, phone numbers and birthdays on a little card so we’d have it. When Larrisa wrote down mine on her little card, her writing started out smaller and got larger. So from a distance the dominate piece of information is my birth year in GREAT BIG numbers. Nineteen…long long time ago! Turns out I guess I’m sensitive about my age!

There was one game where we were supposed to draw a house together, taking turns each making a line. I let Larrisa tell me where to draw my lines and I thought it turned out really neat. The door was a triangle, and the window was a half circle with triangular shaped split panes. I should have taken a picture of it.

Speaking of pictures, I was given permission by Tammy and Larrisa to post pictures online! So I can post pictures of our outings (just no last names and contact info, which I don’t post here about anyone, anyway). Here’s Larrisa and I, standing against a wall in a conference room in an awkward, we-just-met pose.

And one with grandma Tammy, and little brother:

I don’t know why I’m looking off to the left in both pictures. I’m having an aspie moment I guess. Classic staring up into the corner when thinking or uncomfortable.

Anyway, Larrisa and I have our first event scheduled for this Friday and I’m really looking forward to it!

If that were not enough new people for one day, I then spent all afternoon showing the Santa Fe house to prospective tenants. I don’t have it rented yet, so I’ll have to do that again another day. But whew, done with meeting people for today! It was a good day though.

My tree has yellow leaves! And it is not yet fall. We had a long, cold, wintery spring and summer has barely started! What to do?! I googled birch tree with yellow leaves.

The first entry was:

“Yellowing leaves on your birch tree in summer suggest that the soil isn’t draining properly. … Work compost into the soil near the roots and check your watering to ensure you’re not providing too much and creating a puddle around your birch.”

A puddle! A puddle? What’s a puddle? That word brings back vague memories from my childhood and my children’s childhood. Yes, there were once some things called puddles in my life. It’s such a funny word. Puddle. Puddle. There are definitely no puddles within probably several miles of my birch tree. It could be many, many miles of puddle-less terrane. The nearest puddle is probably somewhere in Texas.

The second internet entry was:

“The most common reason for yellowing leaves on a young birch is heat and water stress. The leaves turn completely yellow and drop to the ground. This is a natural reaction of the tree to help reduce stress in the summer.”

Ok, well, I’ll buy that. Except it’s not a “young” birch tree. It’s a fully mature, very valuable (to me) birch tree. This is my critical tree, it’s the one that blocks the house behind ours from gazing into our backyard!

Do I now know anything more than I knew before I googled? No. My tree is stressed. Duh. It could be getting too much water (unlikely). Or not enough water (much more likely). It’s probably too hot (undoubtably). All of which I could basically already guess.

Now I’m going out with the hose to see if I can create a puddle on a rocky slope in the desert.

The discouraging news this morning is that in a recent report, New Mexico ranked last of all the states in child well-being. We’re down there with Louisiana and Mississippi. https://www.sfreporter.com/news/2019/06/17/still-at-the-bottom/

…As it did in 2018, New Mexico ranked 50th in the education domain, but this year the state fell to 50th in the family and community domain, dropping from 49th. The state ranked the same this year as last in the other two domains, economic security (49th) and health (48th).” (https://www.aecf.org/m/databook/2019KC_newsrelease_NM.pdf)

Hopefully our new administration will help by approving policies and funding to start trying to reverse the trend. We have some tech industry here, Sandia and Intel, which put some money into the region, but I don’t think that either company does much for the greater community, that I’m aware of, outside of providing salaries to their own workers.

So we end up with a “have & have not” dichotomy; an island of science and tech workers in a sea of local poverty. Santa Fe is even more extreme – a smaller island of extremely wealthy second-home celebrities and tourists confined to a few prestigious square miles within a very, very poor and rural region.

Meanwhile, I’ve been putting a lot of consideration into what volunteer activity to take on now that I don’t have a full-time job. I spent several months looking into options, so that by the time I actually quit my job, I had pretty much already decided on the Big Brothers Big Sisters (BBBS) program.

This is a nationwide program that matches adult volunteers (the “Big”) with a child (the “Little”). The children enrolled in the program are disadvantaged in some way, but are in stable living situations. The role of the Big is to just be a friend.

So I’m very excited to announce that my application has just been approved and I’ve been matched with my new Little. I will spend a few hours each month with my Little, taking her on outings, such as to the park to play ball, or to a children’s museum, or various age-appropriate community events. It’s up to the Big and the Little to decide what to do for an outing (subject to the parent/guardian’s approval of course).

After applying to the program, I was given several hours of training. It’s a structured program with rules about what we can and can’t do as well as suggestions and guidance about what to expect.

After the training course, I came back the next week for an extensive interview. The interview was 2 hours long and included an assessment of my appropriateness for the program (similar to a job interview), as well as a survey of my interests. They also conducted a background check and interviewed my references.

Then BBBS worked on finding me a good match based on my interests and the interests of the Littles available. Once they found a potential match, they first talked to the Little and her parents/guardians. After the Little and her parents/guardians approved me, BBBS then me to talk to me about the potential Little they had identified. At the end of that discussion, I was asked whether or not I wanted to make a commitment.

They require Bigs to make the commitment prior to actually meeting their potential Little. That’s because they don’t want the Big to back out after the meeting, because the Little could end up feeling personally rejected. So I made the commitment last week when they called me, and I’m looking forward to meeting my new Little.

My new Little’s name is Larissa, and I’ll meet her for the first time later this week. Unfortunately I won’t be able to post pictures of her (nothing identifying) but I can tell you a little bit about her. She’s 10 years old and Native American. She lives with her grandparents and her 5-year-old brother.

They matched us because we are both active and outdoorsy. Larissa’s grandmother said she is a “tomboy” which the BBBS representative put in air quotes because it is a little bit of a gender biased term, as if girls can’t enjoy outdoor activities and still be feminine. But it’s a practical term – I knew immediately what she meant!

It sounds to me like a good match. Our common interests include animals (pets), bike riding, hiking, the zoo, card & board games, cooking, photography, parks, Explora (a local science museum), and community events. Some other things that she listed that I hadn’t listed include sports, motorcycles, electronics, and computers. And she plays the Ukulele at school! She sounds like a very interesting child!

I’ve also been assigned a Match Support Specialist, whose name is Denae. She is a BBBS employee who will be my contact whenever I have any questions or concerns. I am required to stay in regular contact with Denae, so she knows what activities we are doing and how well the match is going.

I will meet Larissa for the first time next week at the BBBS offices. Then we’ll be ready to start our outings. I’m already looking into what sorts of things Albuquerque has for kids. It seems like there’s a lot of fun things we can do!

Darren’s wonderful, wonderful boss, Mike, is in the hospital. Mike was hit by a car on his bicycle on the way to work this morning. He is expected to have full recovery, but was being prepped for surgery last I heard a couple of hours ago.

Mike was hit on the right side, and hit his head on the pavement, cracking his helmet. His right collarbone is broken, three broken ribs on the right side, and his right lung has collapsed. He was out for about 5 minutes and came to in the ambulance. His first CT was good and they don’t think he sustained neurological damage, but they are going to do another scan.

We are all wishing him a very fast and full recovery.

Darren is now questioning his own bicycle commute to work. It’s not a terribly long ride, but he has to get through a major intersection and a freeway exchange. Laura also bikes to work (bike and train).

If we as a society seriously want to move away from being so automobile oriented, we are going to have to invest in better, safer infrastructure for bicyclists. It’s ludicrous to expect a painted line on the road (that simply evaporates at each intersection) to protect bicyclists from the impact of cars. We can’t afford to upgrade everything all at once, but why are we currently spending good money to build roads in the same way we built them nearly 100 years ago?