Getting older

I discovered, when John and I rented a house with a pool in Tucson in August (yes, I’m still talking about that trip, lol), I discovered that I no longer actually fit very well into my swimsuits that I had bought for our honeymoon a decade ago. 11 years ago actually. It’s that last year that made all the difference.

So I ordered new swimsuits on sale online. Swimsuits never really fit me very well (or most of us, for that matter). How many of us are built like models? So I bought them overly large in order to do my own tailoring (it’s much easier to take them in, in some places, than to take them out in other places).

For years I didn’t think I could wear red, because I was a redhead, and redheads don’t wear red, they wear green (and blue). But my hair never was very red, and the red has been fading with age, so now it’s sort of yellowish. Plus, I’m old now, and don’t care as much anymore. So I bought a red swimsuit.

I sat down with my sewing machine to take it in where it needed taken in, to better fit my non-model body, when I discovered I could not see the red thread up against the red fabric. So heck. This has been coming for awhile. I decided I finally needed to go down to the local drug store and buy cheaters.

I stood there, in front of the display, and looked close-up at my hand and my phone as I tried on many different strengths. But I couldn’t see through any of them. Not the +1.00 or the +1.50 or +2.25 or whatever. Not any of them.

Then an old guy came up behind me, so I stepped out of the way and told him to go ahead – none of them seemed to be working for me anyway. And he said, “Of course they aren’t working for you – you’re too young for cheaters.” And I’m thinking, thanks, old guy, but I can’t see my red thread up against my red swimsuit.

I said, “Thanks, but I’m having trouble seeing what I’m sewing.” And he turned toward me and said, “You don’t need cheaters, you need a magnifying glass.” He said “magnifying glass” slowly, with careful enunciation. Mag-ni-fy-ing-glass. Like I never heard of one.

I was thinking, aren’t cheaters magnifying? And I replied, “I tried a magnifying glass but I can’t hold it, and the fabric, and the needle and thread all at once. I need three arms.”

And he said, “You need a magnifying glass on an arm.” And he described how they make magnifying glasses on a stand, so you can work under them.

So I guess I’m finally of the age that I need to start listening to the wisdom of my elders. At least about some things related to getting older.